Breaking Story from NewSpeak Gazette

By Minnie Mao

Saturday, December 26, 2009. It is with sadness that this reporter must relay the shocking incident that occurred on a Delta-Northwest flight as it was landing at the Detroit Metro Airport on Friday, December 25th, the day of our Joyously Secular Winter Holiday.

The Victim, whose name I will not mention due to the tacky intolerance of those rabidly racist and annoyingly average Americans who contemptuously refuse to condone the justifiable outbursts of poor, oppressed, and unappreciated Third World Warriors, was attacked by fellow passengers as he was attempting to light an incendiary device.  These passengers, no doubt, will turn out to be the privileged, pampered, poltroons of American Imperialism.

Our Paragon of Victimhood was attacked by several passengers when he tried to express his people’s pain and suffering at the hands of the Capitalistic Christian Corrupters (CCC).  Not one of the passengers attempted to engage the Victim in a dialogue of conciliatory concern and no one seems to have expressed their empathy with our hero’s Plight of Oppression.  The audacious attack on our Brave Broken Brother is most clearly a heinous and horrific Hate Crime.

The ACLU is expected to sue the passengers for refusing to accept their place in the New World Order.  And the airlines will soon be weeping under the whip of their progressive media masters for failing to provide a safe and secure environment for the fecklessly disaffected.

Today, the progressive community stands united against the reactionary stupidity of self-preservation.

NewSpeak Gazette:  Where Non-Sense Rules!